I took a deep breath closed my eyes opened them again and looked at the worn and broken belt. I spoke these words out loud “I am NOT going to let my self image be defined by a belt! Yes, it fit me 14 years ago and it doesn’t anymore. But that is not who I am!” I walked to the nearest garbage can and threw it away.
I work out 5 times a week either running or doing aerobic DVD’s at least 30 minutes each time. I am not overweight. I am healthy and I feel good with how I look. But this very morning I decided to look for a different belt to wear in my closet. I found this leather one crammed up on a shelf (I think that’s why it was crammed there). I wore it to work 14 years ago when I was a part time photographer for about 6 years. Those were the years I had my 4 children. Over 4 pregnancies I gained and lost and gained and lost weight. Between the last 2 pregnancies I started running while nursing. Oh yeah, I fit into a size 4 juniors shorts (the smallest I think my body has ever been). I had a tiny waist, no butt and was big in all the right places from nursing. But life moved on. I no longer run 7 miles/day and then do an hour work out video as well as nursing a baby. My priorities and goals shifted.
As women in America we live under a microscope causing us to question everything physical. Our self image started as girls watching our moms and shifted to supermodels 6 feet tall wearing size 0 jeans, always airbrushed to perfection on magazine covers. Over the years we women have put ourselves under the microscope and rarely is there a day that goes by that we don’t condemn our bodies in our mirrors.
This morning I said NO MORE! I am happy with myself. I exercise. I eat right. I refuse to let this old belt define me!!!
I invite you to do the same. It has taken many years of affirming positive statements and God’s grace to get here and tomorrow I maybe cursing my abs. But it is enough in this moment to accept me for me not for my size!