There they sat in the corner booth her on her phone texting while he was watching the big screen TV. Were they a couple? Were they really together? They were both in separate worlds but in the same booth at the resturaunt. She looked tired and he looked bored. They only exchanged one sentence. Were they in an argument or content to be together but completely isolated? Their eyes rarely met and their body language looked guarded. You could fit another 3 people between them. All I could think was what happened to them?
Do you ever feel like that in your relationship? Do you ever feel like even though you are physically sitting next to your spouse he/she is a thousand miles away from your life? You said “Yes” to marry this person. You have journeyed for years together. Many of you have raised children together and now here you sit feeling like that couple tired, bored and disconnected. What happened? Probably life…but the more important question is are you prepared to find out what happened and work on the relationship to breathe life and joy back into once more?
Many times life is about routines. We get up in the morning and have our morning routine. We go to work and have our work routine. We come home from work and have our evening routine. We go to bed and have our bedtime routine. Then we do it all over again. Routines are not bad but they can cause us to get into a rut and become stagnant. Once in awhile we need to shake things up. We don’t have to make drastic changes maybe just an unexpected phone call to say “You know I really love you.” Try putting the kids to bed early for a change and instead of turning on that TV, talk, snuggle or kiss each other. In the morning surprise your spouse by doing something different for him/her, something you wouldn’t normally do.
That couple in that booth did not look angry or annoyed with each other they just looked distant. A way to become closer is to get back into each other’s lives. Start talking; pick a new hobby to do together. Do something different, spark a new interest and spice it up a bit. Relationships set on cruise control will wreck if you don’t watch the road and steer it. You have to make an effort to keep your relationship healthy.
Today, reflect on your relationship. Are you that couple in that corner booth?